Navigating Job Loss

When it comes to Leaving Well, I tend to help my clients prepare for leaving a job of their own accord–but what about being fired? Can you still Leave Well? 

Losing your job is one of the most stressful things we can experience–whether you are fired, laid off, or in some other way dealing with a loss of income and benefits. This is a time that brings up an immense spectrum of reactions big and small. You may feel depressed and disappointed. You may have intense worry, fear, or grief. You may also feel a sense of failure, confusion, and anger. All of them are valid! 

Unfortunately, many of us never learned how to acknowledge, process, and talk about difficult emotions. And if we can’t speak about what we’re going through, we can perpetuate the stress and grief of job loss rather than working through it. 

Emotional First-Aid After Job Loss

It’s common to feel grief about the loss, and it might take you some time to put words to your experience. Give yourself as many days as you need to process the loss of your job, and remember that some days will feel better than others. The biggest piece of emotional care you can offer yourself is to release feelings of self-blame and shame–these emotions tend to make us feel worse and it can be really hard to pull yourself out of this ditch once you’re in it.

You might have some stress around the changes to your routine and schedule, and it can be helpful to mimic the rituals from your workday once you’re feeling a bit better–things like making your morning coffee, listening to a podcast or music as you get dressed, taking a lunch break even if you’re home all day, etc. You may not feel like doing basic things like taking a shower and eating well, but “dressing for the day” like you used to can help keep your mindset more positive as you navigate the ups and downs. 

It may seem obvious, but don’t forget to eat, stay hydrated, move your body, and get fresh air. It’s tempting to stay inside and avoid people while you feel your feelings, but a walk around the block can be a great antidote to lingering feelings of gloom. 

Reach out to a trusted friend, family member, mentor, or therapist to talk through the emotions and thoughts you’re experiencing. If you have access to an Employee Assistance Program (EAP), use those benefits to find a counselor in your area. If you’re not ready to speak with someone yet, try journaling with a pen and paper. The physical act of writing can be very cathartic and help you organize your thoughts. 

After the initial dust has settled, take a moment to pause and affirm the accomplishments you had from your job. Write them down–capture the things you’re proud of from your time there. 

Networking and Job Hunting After Job Loss

It likely feels tender to start putting out feelers for a new job search after losing your job, but the good news is that the folks you already know may have leads or recommendations for you. If you feel comfortable doing so, share your situation with everyone you can think of—they may know of an open position or have a contact in your field. 

You can also look for opportunities to network and place yourself in situations where you might meet people outside your typical circle. Your energy may go up and down, so give yourself some grace if you don’t attend every possible networking event. 

You might want to volunteer more with more time in your schedule for new projects, but make sure to check in with yourself before committing to new uses of your time. Guard it wisely and ensure that you’re fully able and willing to commit to any new obligations.

Practical Advice After Job Loss

This unexpected break from employment, while admittedly stressful, is also an opportunity to explore the things that often fall to the bottom of your priority list–such as trying out a new coffee shop, purging the hall closet, or reading a book you’ve had on your nightstand for months. Job searches have so many variables and might take a while, so you may as well do some of the things you’ve been saving for an undetermined “someday.” 

While you may feel stressed or uneasy about finances, I encourage you to pause before making any drastic financial decisions, including opening new lines of credit. Take time to review your finances and budget with anyone you share financial decisions with. And get creative–maybe you can absorb more of the household responsibilities during this temporary drought in income. For instance, if your household usually opts for grocery delivery, you could go in person to save on fees and tips. You might also look for a part-time gig or freelance job to make ends meet if needed, while you’re searching for a new full-time role. 

After you’ve taken some time to process the loss, take back control by updating your resume and portfolio–be sure to include the list of accomplishments and impacts you’re proud of.

Dos and Don’ts

To briefly recap, I’ve summarized these tips into an easy Dos and Don’ts list. You might want to print it off and tuck it away to refer back to in case you or anyone you know needs it in the future.

DO: 

• Acknowledge difficult feelings, and expect that it may take time to fully process them

• Take opportunities to network and meet people outside your typical groups and networks 

• Share your situation with everyone you can think of and let them know you’re in the market for new opportunities

• Shower and dress for the day as you normally would

• Recreate daily rituals like coffee or a podcast in the morning, taking a lunch break, etc.

• Eat, drink water, move your body, and get fresh air 

• Affirm the accomplishments and impacts you’re proud of from your job 

• Explore things that haven’t been a priority (like visiting that coffee shop or cleaning out the hall closet)

• Review finances with other decision-makers in the household

• Consider changes to household labor that can help accommodate the lack of income 

• Speak with your household/family, including children–consider what level of honesty and detail can be shared with them, not leaving them in the dark but also trying to avoid making them afraid for the future 

• Reinforce your skills and talents, update your resume, and get recommendations and reassurance from friends and colleagues to bolster your confidence 

DO NOT: 

• Avoid your emotions or talking about them

• Blame or shame yourself for the situation 

• Make drastic financial decisions (including credit) 

• Take on new volunteer opportunities without checking in with yourself that you are fully able to commit to a new obligation 

HOT TIP: Noorain Khan curates THE most amazing list of job opportunities through the Interested? publication (you can also share job opportunities with Noorain here: interestednewsletter@gmail.com)

If you are an organizational leader, board member, or a curious staff member, take the Leaving Well Assessment to discover your organization's transition readiness archetype at  naomihataway.com/assessment.

To listen to a podcast version of this article, listen to Episode 6 of the Leaving Well Podcast: Navigating Job Loss.